Hello Everyone,

My name is Judy Perry, and I am a Lesbian living in South Florida. I would like to share my story with you. I was with my partner for 18 years. Together we raised our daughter, April, and lived a wonderful life. Three years ago, our lives changed forever. While I was at work, Thora had a seizure. We immediately went to the hospital, and were given the news of her cancer. Thora had stage four lung cancer. It had metastasized to her brain. She was told, she had 3 months, to 3 years to live. We were devastated. Since we knew of other sad stories of gay people not having any rights when their partners became terminally ill, we had living wills, and health care surrogate papers drawn up. This, was one of the best decisions we made.

Unfortunately, 45 days after Thora was diagnosed, we were faced with the news that she would not make it through the day. After being together for 18 years, we well knew each others wishes, and wanted to carry them out. Thora could not breathe very well, and was slipping away before my very eyes. When the Dr. ordered the life support, I kindly told them no. Which is when, she asked, “are you next of kin?” No was my answer. I was told they had to do it, unless any blood relatives or spouses were available to speak for Thora. Thank God, our attorney had recommended we have the legal health care surrogate, and living will papers shrunk down, and on us at all times. I nervously pulled the card from my wallet, and the life support order was legally declined. I felt relieved, powerful, happy, and sad, at the same time. I was able to keep Thora’s wishes. This is a right I should have had without having to go through the uncertainty of wondering if those documents would be valid.

Thora, and I shared everything, our home, our cars, our bills. Thankfully, we were prepared, and I was able to keep everything. Thora had better health insurance, and Aflac, which were better than the health care I had through my employer. If we would have been legally married, I would have been able to get the additional benefits that go along with marriage. I lost…. No additional benefits for me! And I had helped pay for those benefits throughout the years we were together.

I thank you for allowing me to share my story. I also urge you to tell yours. Help spread the word, that we deserve the same rights as heterosexuals, as far as legal marriage is concerned. This website is here for all gay people, and the people that love them. We must fight proposition 8!!! Please, please, share your stories, and sign the petition.

Thank You
Judy Perry
Boca Raton, Fl

This entry was posted on Friday, January 23rd, 2009 at 7:58 pm and is filed under Testimonials. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.